The Reckoning

Here is the trick, and it is not complicated. You will make the single largest unplanned purchase of your life inside 72 hours of the worst news you have ever had, from a salesman you will meet once, in a room designed to stop you asking questions.

There is no comparison shopping. There is no cooling-off period in most states. There is a package price that hides which of the eleven things you just bought were optional, and a social convention that says haggling over your mother is monstrous.

It is not monstrous. It is the last piece of admin you will ever do for someone you loved, and doing it well is a form of love. This section exists to make that possible.

Federal law is already on your side more than you think. Under the FTC Funeral Rule, a funeral provider has to give you an itemised price list, has to quote prices over the phone, cannot require you to buy a package to get a single item, and cannot refuse to handle a casket you bought elsewhere. Most people are never told any of this.

Published

• Somebody died. The first 48 hours, in order
• Direct cremation: what it actually costs, and the number they’ll quote you instead
• The FTC Funeral Rule, in plain English: what they legally cannot do to you

In the works

Next up, in order:

• Embalming is almost never required by law. Here is who told you it was, and why
• The casket you are allowed to buy somewhere else and make them use
• Green burial: what it costs, where it is legal, and which "eco" options are marketing
• Pre-need plans: the ones that survive the funeral home going under, and the ones that do not

Want one of these bumped up the list, or have a bill you would like us to take apart? Send it over. Names removed, always.

We are writers, not lawyers or funeral directors. Anything here that matters legally or financially, verify with someone licensed in your state.